Archive for March, 2006

A NEW KIDNAPPING PLOY…….bonbon

March 16th, 2006 by admin

A FRIEND FORWARDED THIS TO ME. PLEASE READ!

Subject:NEW KIDNAPPING PLOY
Seems like every nice thing people do for one another can be
perverted!

A New form of kidnapping

Please read this, a new twist on kidnapping, a very smart survivor.
About a month ago there was a woman standing by the mall entrance passing
out flyers to all the women going in. The woman had written the flyer
herself to tell about an experience she had, so that she might warn other
women. The previous day, this woman had finished shopping, went out to her
car and discovered that she had a flat.

She got the jack out of the trunk and began to change the flat. A nice man
dressed in business suit and carrying a briefcase walked up to her and said,
“I noticed you’re changing a flat tire. Would you like me to take care of it
for you?” The woman was grateful for his offer and accepted his help. They
chatted amiably while the man changed the flat, and then put the flat tire
and the jack in the trunk, shut it and dusted his hands off.

The woman thanked him profusely, and as she was about to get in her car, the
man told her that he left his car around on the other side of the mall, and
asked if she would mind giving him a lift to his car. She was a little
surprised and she asked him why his car was on other side. He explained that
he had seen an old friend in the mall that he hadn’t seen for some time and
they had a bite to eat and visited for a while he got turned around in the
mall and left through the wrong exit, and now he was running late and his
car was clear around on the other side of the mall.

The woman hated to tell him “no” because he had just rescued her from having
to change her flat tire all by herself, but she felt uneasy. Then she
remembered seeing the man put his briefcase in her trunk before shutting it
and before he asked her for a ride to his car. She told him that she’d be
happy to drive him around to his car, but she just remembered one last thing
she needed to buy. She said she would only be a few minutes; he could sit
down in her car and wait for her; she would be as quick as she could be.

She hurried into the mall, and told a security guard what had happened; the
guard came out to her car with her, but the man had left. They opened the
trunk, took out his locked briefcase and took it down to the police station.
The police opened it (ostensibly to look for ID so they could return it to
the man). What they found was rope, duct tape, and knives. When the police
checked her “flat” tire, there was nothing wrong with it; the air had simply
been let out. It was obvious what the man’s intention was, and obvious that
he had carefully thought it out in advance. The woman was blessed to have
escaped harm.

How much worse it would have been if she had children with her and had them
wait in the car while the man fixed the tire, or if she had a baby strapped
into a car seat? Or if she’d gone against her judgment and given him a lift?

I’d like you to forward this to all the women you know. It may save a life..
A candle is not dimmed by lighting another candle. I was going to send this
to the ladies only; but guys, if you love your mothers, wives, sisters,
daughters, etc., you may want to pass it on to them, as well.

Send this to any woman you know that may need to be reminded that the world
we live in has a lot of crazies in it….better safe than sorry.

PLEASE BE SAFE AND NOT SORRY!

JUST A WARNING TO ALWAYS BE ALERT AND USE YOUR HEAD!!!

Category: Bisaya | 8 Comments »

Halo-Halong Pasi-aw by Chikai

March 13th, 2006 by admin

 A man was cornered by a lion so he prayed “Lord make this lion a Christian.” The lion suddenly knelt down and prayed “bless  this food which i’m about to receive thru Christ our Lord. Amen.  

Son: Mommy, come quick! There’s a stranger having sex with yaya!
Mom: What! Who?
Son: Hahaha! Joke ra oi! it’s only daddy. Kulbaan ka no? Abi nimo stranger? (hehehe!)

Son: Pa, unsa gani iningles anang buta?
Papa: Na! Mao nani ron, anak, basta ingles na gani, ayaw ko pangutan-a ana kay “blind” ko anang mga butanga, oki?

 

In a private school:
Teacher: Lolly, nganong brayt man ka?
Lolly: Promil user from 6 months until now.
Teacher: I see and you Chikai?  Nganong bugo man ka?
Chikai: Emperador user mam, isang tagay sa tagumpay!

Bana: Love , nganong gahilak man ka?
Asawa: Sweetheart, ingon atong mga silingan akong dagway mura kuno og iro. huhuhu.
Bana: Mga way batasan! Imo unta sila gipaak! 

Benigna: Dong, ugma na raba ang bunyag sa atong anak.
Benigno: Aw maayo hinuon. Unya unsa man ipangalan nimo sa atong anak?
Benigna: Kuan unta……………………………………………………………. Benignit!

 

Sa Motel:
Laki: Tagpilay room ninyo diri?
Cashier: special o ordinary?
Laki: Unsay kalainan?
Cashier: Kung special, naay TV ug masahista. Kung ordinary, ang masahista naay TB.

Guy1: tol, gusto nko pulihan akong ngalan
Guy2: ngano, unsa diay ngalan nimo?
Guy1: joseph putingtae
Guy2: pangit jud diay. unsa man gusto nimo ipuli?
Guy1: ricky putingtae…

Apo: Lo, nganong gakaang-kaang man ka maglakaw?
Lolo: Ingon man gud sa akong doktor na likayan kuno nako ang itlog kay taas ug cholesterol.

Mister: doc, akong ipa check-up akong asawa.  kay 1st night namo, nagdugo man nga burikat mani daan. (Gitan-aw sa doctor)
Doc: ay mister ayaw kabalaka, napaksi ra diay ang kubal! (hehehe!) 
 

Category: Pasi-aw | 7 Comments »

unsaon pag ila sa tae..by:lolli

March 10th, 2006 by admin

Naay koy pangutana kaninyo, kong maka kita mog tae unsaon ninyo pag ila kong babaye o lalaki ang tag-iya sa tae. :)

Unya spellinga kono ninyo ang rattan sa duha lang ka letra beh.

Gurls dia na ang spring siggy ninyo nahuman ko man karon maong gi post ko nalang kay ma busy akong beauty sa dominggo, kanang naka duha diha premyo na nila sa tigmo hehe… special  mention kay Chikai inig makaabot kana gani sa US, ayha ko ra butangan ug spring imong siggy ha.

    

 Unsaon pag save sa siggy, right click mouse dayon save nimo sa imong folder, pag di pa gani mouban nimo Bonbon, hala poyoka aron mokoyog nimo.

Happy weekend bisdak!

 

Category: Istorya | 11 Comments »

Tigmo- Tigmo Pod Ni “Ladynred

March 9th, 2006 by admin

1. Sa ilalom kabato-an, sa ibabaw katunukan.

2. Sa gamay pa gisanina-an, sa dako na gihubuan.

3. Kaban ni Lolli , ukbon dili na mauli.

4. Sa ilalom kabato-an, sa ibabaw kadaruhan.

5. Daghang minatay, dili mamangon, usa raý lungon.

6. Balay ni Tisay, napuno ug tai sa ilaga.

7. Balay nako sa Pinas usa raý haligi.

8. Putlan kay taas, sumpayan kay mobo.

9. Sop-sopon ko ang imong dugo ug ilabay ko ang imong unod. 

10. Kung molingkod taas, kong motindog mobo.

11. Kogoson ko ikaw, aron mohilak.

12. Paloson ko ang imong panit aron kan-on ko ang imong unod.

13. Usa raý ilang balay, unom silang nagpuyo apan dili sila magkakit-anay.

14. Buhok ni Juicy, dili madupa.

15. Dili malaya, dili maihap.

16. Nagtago si Frenchie nakita ang ulo.

17. Ning-adto ko sa inyong balay, daghan tawo didto pero wala sila magtingog.

18. Duha ka sakayan, usa raý makasakay.

19. Duhaý suoton, usa raý suongon.

20. Nadunot na ang unod wala pa ang bukog.”

Palihog ug e-mail sa inyong the “BEST”picture….

Category: Mga tigmo | 10 Comments »